The Brink of War

I love Jeff Daniels, period. Put his name on a movie and I will show up like a loyal little bitch with snacks and absolutely no follow-up questions. Unfortunately, The Brink of War rewarded that devotion with some of the worst casting I have ever seen. Daniels plays Ronald Reagan, which is technically true because the credits say so, but my fucking eyeballs spent the entire movie filing an appeal. Apple confirms the alleged Reagan situation.

Jeff Daniels did not pass for Ronald Reagan. Not a little bit. Not from a flattering angle, across a dark room, during a power outage, while I was being legally declared blind. He looked like Jeff Daniels had wandered onto a presidential movie set and everyone was too polite to tell him the costume department had made a terrible mistake. It was so distracting that every time someone called him "Mr. President," my brain screamed, "That is Harry fucking Dunne."

Beyond that, the movie tried desperately to make the 1986 Reykjavík Summit feel like two men were defusing a nuclear bomb with their dicks. In reality, most of the movie is Ronald Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachev sitting around talking in circles while serious men nearby look concerned. Every conversation is presented like civilization could explode between sentences, but after a while it felt like watching two grandfathers argue over the warranty on a missile.

Yes, I know my history. The summit was incredibly important, and the negotiations helped move the United States and Soviet Union away from nuclear catastrophe. I understand why this meeting mattered. The Paley Center describes it as a defining Cold War moment that helped move the world away from nuclear war. Understanding the historical importance, however, did not magically make watching two hours of diplomatic verbal constipation interesting.

By the time Reagan and Gorbachev finally reached the big dramatic handshake, I was too bored to appreciate humanity narrowly avoiding annihilation. The movie worked so hard to convince me that peace was exciting that I started rooting for the fucking mushroom cloud just to move the plot along. I came for Jeff Daniels, stayed out of misplaced loyalty, and left wishing they had just nuked us. Maddie out.